The Highland Games
by sabresrthebest
Summary: When the boys get into a fight over a girl, there is only one way to settle the dispute! Come along with the gang to the lovely hills of Scotland for a -well-different round of the Highland Games! Not ATU. Read, review, and enjoy! :)


Hi everyone! I started a story here awhile ago in the Beatles fandom but it kind of went on hiatus…I apologize. Anyways, this is my stab at a humorous adventure for the boys and our girlfriends. Kristen and Becky are the female characters from a co-write my friend and I are working on, so hopefully that will be up soon.

Anyways, I'd like to say that I do know what the Highland Games are and how important they are to Scottish history and culture, and I mean no offense to them by this parody. They are a wonderful showcase of culture to the rest of the world. I just decided to make this fun.

Also, the Beatles are my favorite band, and deserve the utmost respect, I mean no disrespect to them either, this just was a little joke that eventually turned into something.

I will warn you that there is language—but in a rather humorous way.

So please, enjoy! This is for laughs! Kristen and Becky are my characters, and all songs/references are copyright to their respective owners.

**The Beginning**

The cameras clicked and flashed again just as they had for the past four hours. Kristen and Becky were doing a photoshoot for some magazine-they had lost track of which one-while the boys were amused shooting their new film, A Hard Day's Night. Dressed in skimpy red dresses and almost sinfully high boots, the girls flashed their smiles in a variety of poses, surrounded by empty vodka bottles and furniture. Brian Epstein had knowingly kept the boys on a tight schedule for the whole day, as he knew what consequences there would be if they found their way to the shoot.

"There! Another smile! Good!" the photographer praised, as Kristen and Becky's smiles were frankly tired of smiling.

Just then out of nowhere, the boys entered with loud gales of laughter. Having somehow evaded Brian's schedule again, they had decided to pay the girls a visit. As soon as they walked in and looked up, the conversation stopped, and they gasped.

"Son….." John stared.

"Of….." Paul gasped, eyeing Kristen up in her skanky outfit.

"Uh….." Ringo said, unintentionally adding to the phrase, as he had no idea what was going on.

"Bitch!" George finished, not believing his eyes.

Hearing the commotion, the photographer turned around and smiled: "If you'd like to have a seat they'll be done soon."

"Hubba hubba!" Paul grinned, as they all sat down.

"Shut up, Paul." George and Ringo said in unison as Ringo picked up a copy of The Queen.

"Hot damn look at my girl's legs!" John smiled proudly, as Becky's legs were well visible in the dress she was wearing.

"The dress looks very nice on her." George added to John's comment.

"And, uh, Kristen's, uh, chest looks rather….nice…." John stuttered, trying to figure out how to give a complement without it sounding awkward.

George laughed: "It does, thank you. I know you're not trying to creep."

"Good."

"Didn't he say they were gonna be done soon?" Paul asked, looking at John.

"Yes. Why don't I like the sound of your question?"

"Because," Paul winked, taking his suit coat off, "You shouldn't."

"What the hell are you doing?!"

Paul grinned and snickered: "I'm gonna get me some action, Johnny Boy. You might get some too!"

"Good point!"

George, shy person that he was, sat there quietly and watched his girlfriend model a very sexy dress—one that he wished he could take off. Glancing over at Paul and John, he saw a familiar gleam in their eyes, and sighed, as he knew they would pounce as soon as the girls stood up.

At this point, both John and Paul were in their boxers and sitting in the chairs, anxiously awaiting the girls. The photographer in charge had given them multiple looks that ranged from dirty to insane, and eventually just ignored their antics for the rest of the shoot.

"Wonderfully voluptuous, ladies," the photographer praised, "And we'll call it a day."

"Thank you!" the girls smiled, as they stood up. Confusion was etched all over their faces as they saw the boys. John and Paul just about naked, George beet red, and Ringo just relaxing with a magazine.

"What are you guys doing here," Kristen asked, "I thought you guys were shooting today."

"We were darling, but my pants led me here." Paul replied smartly with a wink, making Kristen roll her eyes.

"Johnny?" Becky asked, utterly perplexed.

"Hello beautiful." He said sweetly, sauntering over to Becky and picking her up.

"What are you doing? Why are you half naked?"

"I'll show you in a few minutes." He told her before winking at the group and carrying his girlfriend off.

"Score. One for John, zero for Paul." Ringo deadpanned, not looking up from his magazine.

Rolling her eyes, Kristen went to walk out of the room, but was halted by Paul's voice. "Where you off to, sweets?"

"To change so Georgie and I can go home."

"Stay awhile!" Paul said, with a sweeping motion of his hands and a wink, "My lap is ready for you."

"You're repulsive."

"I know I am, love. And that's what makes me irresistible."

"In your dreams." Kristen replied under her breath.

George, totally ignoring Paul, walked up to her and gave her a kiss on the cheek: "You look absolutely perfect."

"Thank you darling," She smiled, giving him a peck on the lips, "I'm just going to go change, I'll be back, and then we can go home."

"Okay."

Smiling, and ignoring Paul's persistent flirtations, Kristen proceeded to walk down the hall towards the dressing room, taking her heavy necklace off. She stopped outside the room to hear giggling, and raising an eyebrow, tried to turn the doorknob, only to find it locked. "Becky? Open up, it's me!"

"Busy, come back later!" A male's voice sounded, turning out to be John's.

Grinning, Kristen began to head back to the main room, only to hear a crash followed by a shout. Growing concerned, she picked up her pace until she was in a slow jog. Entering the main room, she saw an almost naked Paul and a fully clothed George wrestling, George's weapon of choice being Paul's discarded tie.

"You're a fucking bastard!" Paul managed to choke out, as George straddled him and tightened the tie.

"What the hell?!" Kristen shouted, running over ad trying to pull George off of Paul, which never worked.

"Fucking bastard told me he wanted to shag you." George hissed, still staring down at Paul.

Kristen sighed: "Why do you guys always have to fight?"

"Because I'm more of a man than he is!" Paul exclaimed, managing to loosen the noose George had created.

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"It's not my fault you're gay for John!"George shot back.

"What the HELL?! I am not!"

"You are! I'd bet if you had the chance you'd ram your dick up his ass quicker than quick!"

Paul snickered and slyly answered: "No, but I'd gladly ram it up your girlfriend."

"That's it!" George announced, going to strangle Paul again.

Rolling her eyes, Kristen flopped down in John's vacated chair, finally being able to see the humor in the situation. This factor only increased when an enraged Brian Epstein stormed through the doors. "Alright! Toss em over, they missed another press conference!"

"Fuck you, George!" Paul hissed.

"Suck mine, Paul!"

Just then, a confused Brian stopped in his tracks and eyed up Kristen: "Whoa…."

"You're gay, Brian." She gently reminded him.

"Oh yeah….yeah….right….," He said, clearing his throat, "What the hell is going on here?!"

"Basically, from what I know, my boyfriend is being a darling and protecting my honor."

"Ohhhhhh….."

"Ah! Oh gosh! I KNEW you were gay, Paul!" John laughed maniacally, entering the room holding Becky's hand.

"Oh, hey guys. Plop a squat. It's just getting good." Kristen said, motioning to the two empty chairs beside Ringo.

"You two get off!" Brian said, forcing George and Paul apart, "Now what the hell is the problem?"

"What do you think? They're fighting over a bird."

"Again?" Epstein groaned, "Isn't there a way to settle this?"

"Nope."

"How about a competition!" Becky grinned.

"That's a good idea! To prove whoever is worthy!"

"Of what? Me?" Kristen asked.

"Exactly!"

"I have no part in this." Brian groaned, walking out of the studio.

"What do you mean, a contest?" Paul asked skeptically.

"Simple," John said, "Have different events, and whoever has the most points gets the girl once and for all. Judged by myself, Becky, and Kristen!"

"Like the Olympics?" George asked.

"No," Paul sighed, "More like the Highland Games."


End file.
